“Desire for A Partner”

I don’t want to be seen only for non-relationship purposes
I want to be seen as potential partner 
I see guys who deceptively make me think they want me for me and mind and personality 

All they ever wanted really from me was my body 

My body was almost a laundering tool for perpetual men to get their nightly desire from 

I don’t want to be seen as that even though I clearly state that I’m not interested in that

I can’t even fathom the toll it has on me wanting to find my partner and wanted to be found by him 

It made me unable to see the world that “ love is possible” because I just can’t anymore and I weep a tear as I write this 

Internet men are so far worse than meet in person men but there is still no Total` faith that a in person man won’t act like an internet man 

Internet men is simply men you meet on social media or the internet and in person men is simply men you meet in person or face to face.

I told myself that internet men are the worst and try to wait for your in person man, but how when no one has the same desire for a relationship and love as me …

The desire for quality time , physical touch , acts of service and the other 2 languages of love I see displayed on tv makes it hard to believe I would find my tethered or in-person man in my life ……